Trust me, there is no way I would be able to make this stuff up (okay, maybe a couple of bottles of wine and watching 'Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas' might give me the ability to make stuff like this up...). When you have a child, they don't hand you the baby, a copy of 'A Parent's Guide to Not Screwing It Up', give you the card of a good therapist and send you on your way. They give you the baby and that's about it. Off you go. Good luck.
If you don't have kids, or don't spend a lot of time around them, it can be hard to believe that some of the weirdest and most wonderful things happen when you are around them. And while Little P is full of personality, she's still just 19 months old, so a lot of what I write comes from my wonderful friends and from just watching other parents and their kids.
I see it this way - I have friends without kids (and actually some with) who still party like a rock star and some of the things they get up to would make even the most hard core of celebrities blush. It's the same thing with kids. You could almost make a game out of it. It would go something like this:
"So, your 3 year old son likes to run around without pants on and show everyone his penis? I'll see your 3 year old penis with Prince Harry being naked and raise you a grown man passing out in his front yard with his pants around his ankles.
Okay. How about a 2 year old who won't wear anything unless it's pink. Tantrums and thrown items occur if she's not in head to toe pink. Too easy. I'll see your 2 year old pink lover and raise you a 56 year old woman who not only wears nothing but pink, but her hair is pink, her dog is pink, her car is pink and everything in her house is pink.
How about a 4 year old who uses the word 'f**k' to describe everything (his parent's are so proud). Please, I know grown ups who can't say one sentence without peppering it with at least 5 cuss words."
It somehow becomes a weird version of 'Anything you can do, I can do better'. But at the end of the day, when a kid put his underwear on his head, it's kind of cute; an adult does it, well, it's just kind of sad (occasionally funny too, but mostly just sad).
See, I don't need to make this stuff up - it's happening, everyday. I have no doubt that when we go to the park today, I will see something that will make me pull out my notebook and pen and start jotting down notes.
Life is interesting. It's happening around you all the time. You just have to pay attention to what is going on. If you slow down and just look around, you will see all sorts of interesting things happening. It, of course, helps that I live in Las Vegas - this place is a mecca for the weird and wonderful.
So, my beautiful people, till next time, keep your eyes open, and you just may see something interesting.
Mommy-ism #41: It's the quirks we have that make us unique. I know one little boy that will only eat food if it's green (green food coloring gets used a lot in that house) and one little girl that refuse’s to wear any clothes that aren't pink (as in, she would rather be naked than not wear pink). And Little P? Well she thinks everything belongs in her toy box - and I mean everything. I've found our shoes, car keys, tissues, cushions, books and even her sippy cup in there (today it was were the cookies belonged). I know, it could be way worse.